That time of year

Its the time of year where stress levels are through the roof! People in town are on edge, walking on eggshells. I'm one of them. I, however, am not robbing banks or going out in a blast of sheriff gunfire. I can't believe the things people do when they're desperate.

I am so thankful for the roof over my family's head, and food on their bellies. I'm thankful for the car that works, the heat that runs. I'm thankful for the electricity that's on, water that's running, and gas fire me to cook with. I am so thankful for the health of my loved ones, and the ability to take them to the doctor when they need medical attention.

I'm so grateful for all of these things, but feel so selfish in feeling that its just not enough. I'm human. What I have isn't enough, I want more. How lame is that?

It's the holidays, a time for giving, a time for loving, and a time for being grateful. I know I'm not perfect, I know I'm greedy for wanting more than what I have, but I appreciate the things I do have.

Please go about your day, every time you are feeling greedy, think of the things you have that you appreciate. It's so easy to say nothing, but I know you appreciate your cup of coffee, or your dog, or your heater in the car that you also appreciate. Appreciating little things in your life sure do make the crappy things a lot easier to deal with.

I hope everyone has a happy Tuesday.

New News!!

       Hellllllooooo all! It has been a while again, and I apologize for that. I've been a littttle preoccupied with morning sickness (all the time) and mommying because I'm pregnant again! This one was a bit of a surprise, but we are still excited for a new addition to our wonderful family!

        We've been experiencing changes in our lives other than our new little one on the way. I stopped cleaning houses when I found out I was pregnant. The first trimester is a very important stage of development and I used way too many unsafe products on a daily basis. It's been lovely to be a stay-at-home-mom again. I hate being away from my little Mary.

       Matthew has started working close-by, and I am so proud of him for getting such a godsend of a job during this rough economy. He seems to enjoy his work and he has long hours, but less days of work. I still have to get used to him being away again, I seriously miss him when he's gone. Mary looked for him yesterday when he was at work (which tugged my heartstrings a bit) so I told her Daddy was working and changed the subject with a nice book.

       She has been absolutely loving reading time, and makes me laugh every chance she can. I love how she pretends to eat the food out of the pictures and then pretends to feed me the food saying, "mmmm yimmy yimmy!" (yummy). Her new favorite thing to say is "Are you okay?" or "Are you alright?" and sometimes gets stuck in a loop on the "are you" part. It is so cute when she says "Are you are you are you alright?"! She also says things like "Hi! How you doing?" and "Do you want this mimi (her name for me)?". But like any mom my favorite is when she tells me adoringly that she loves me.

       She is almost a pro at walking down stairs; she thinks she doesn't need to hold my hand anymore, and she's almost right! Mary loves jumping up and down, feet together. Especially in the shower (splash!). I can't wait for the rainy season so I can get her galoshes to jump in the puddles! She finds everything as a wonder. Opens the curtains a crack and peeks through saying, "Wowww! Outside!". I feel like everything she does makes me proud and grin from ear to ear!

       I am going a tad crazy thinking about raising a 2 year old and a newborn at the same time, but plenty of others (including my parents) have done it and I can do it too. Does it make me freak out any less? Nope. It'll all work out though and I am more experienced now. I'm 4 months pregnant right now and can almost find out the sex! How exciting is that!? We're hoping for a boy! I just hope this morning sickness at least stops at 6 months or before like with Mary! I am sooo sick of being sick.

        I have been reading a lot on breastfeeding and potty training; my next two big missions. I didn't realize how many foods naturally boost your lactation! I wish I knew with Mary I would have possibly been able to breastfeed longer than the 6 weeks I did. Did you know that there are white blood cells that pass through your milk to your baby that your booby custom made to have the anti-bodies for your specific child to develop a healthy immune system? It is amazing how much better breastfeeding is for your baby than formula. Formula wont adjust to meet your baby's specific needs! I am so excited about breastfeeding this time around that I dream about it sometimes! WEIRD!

        I'm exhausted and am nauseous now from staring at the computer, but I will try to write again soon now that I have free time. Hopefully, I'll have more anti-nausea medicine by then.

       Have a great Saturday people!

Busy, Busy, Busy

      I am so sorry I haven’ been writing lately. I have been beyond busy. I have been so occupied with life the past few weeks, I haven’t had a chance to get on my blog!

       It is a very different life, being a working mom after being a stay-at-home-mom for so long. I miss experiencing Mary’s daily feats and the quality time I got to spend with her constantly. Now, I work all week, come home, feed Mary, play a little before bedtime and the day is over! I am more than grateful to have the weekends free to play with my dear baby.I just miss her so much during the week!

       I am so proud of my husband and what a great stay-at-home-dad he has been for these past months. He’s had side jobs here and there, but he spends almost all of his time with her and he loves it! It is lovely to hear him excitedly tell me about what she accomplished in a day, reminding me of myself not to long ago.

       Mary is talking constantly now, throwing in every word in her vocabulary every time she has a chance to do so. She keeps a grin on my face whenever she is present. Sometimes I catch myself just staring at her fascinated by her passion for life and figuring it out. She gives hugs accompanied by a soft “Awwww” and kisses with a big “shmack”.

       Suddenly I had an epiphany. My mom loves me the way I love her. My mom stared at me the same way, thinking the same thought, “How is it possible to feel this much love? So much love coursing through my veins that I can feel my heart flutter. So much love that I would give my life in a second without hesitation if I was guaranteed that my precious child would have the most perfectly happy,  healthy, fruitful, worry-free life.” I never had loved my mom as much as I did from that moment on. I never truly appreciated or understood how much I meant to her and how much I probably have hurt her throughout my earlier life.

       I now strive to achieve that one day from my daughter. One day far in the future when she starts a family of her own; I want her to experience how much I love her. I know you’re thinking, “Wow, that is planning ahead to the max!”, but I know the road to the success of that goal starts now. I have to be the best mom I can be from the start, like my mom. I have to endure the terrible twos to the rebellious teenage years and the years following where I might feel she doesn’t need me anymore. But one day, I will get the satisfaction of knowing that I, like my mom, was the best mom ever. Not necessarily of all the moms on earth I am the ultimate MOM, but just knowing that I was the best fit for my Mary, and that she knows it.

       It might all be some ridiculous sounding _wish-^wash. However, this is what’s on my mind, and I bet it’s gone through other new mom’s minds as well. I wonder if every mom has that moment where they suddenly feel this new overwhelmingly loving feeling for your mom, glowing brighter than ever before. If they don’t, they should because it is wonderful.

      Mommy Tip of the Day:

       If you’re going on a hike or spending family time outdoors sunscreen can be bulky and _heavy to carry around. Sometimes it opens in the bag and makes a greasy mess on everything! When we went to Boatnik this weekend, I brought with me a chapstick-like sunscreen. It’s made by Water Babies and I’m sure other brands make it too. It looks like a big chapstick or rub-on glue stick. It is SO SIMPLE and MESS-FREE. I think it tickled a bit going on too. I would definitely recommended this to anyone who wants a lightweight, easy-to-use, mess-free sunscreen.

       Remember, you can’t just put it on at home and leave it there because it does have to be reapplied every couple hours (more or less depending on type of activity and SPF)!

Again, this is just MY OPINION. I am not a professional of any sort. I am not an expert. Nor am I affiliated with any baby supply companies. I am just a mommy, and this is what I think.